Best Day Ever (ebook)

Argumento de Best Day Ever (ebook)

Chapter 19: BRING SOMETHING TO THE PARTY Giving. What an incredible gift. When you give, do you expect something in return? If you do, you?ll be disappointed. If you can give unconditionally, you?re special. Bring Something to the Party True givers bring something to the party. They play with the kids, they smile, they wash dishes, they bring goodies, they cook, they love, they help. We appreciate them. It?s so much more rewarding to be a giver than a taker. I?ve had friendships with people I thought were great. The more time I spent with them the less I enjoyed their company. They were takers. You know who you are. You?re bitter. You?re weary. You don?t smile enough. You don?t hug your friends. You shake their hands and keep them out of your space. You get the check when you?re at dinner, collect the money, tell everybody you need a little more as there?s not enough for the tip. You tipped five percent and kept the balance! They brought nothing to the party. There are few people in my circle that don?t bring something to the party. We don?t invite them back! Giving to Charities When you give to a charity, are you expecting to get some sort of return? When we give to charities, I think we all hope to receive some benefit. Save the whales. Buy the pastor a new Mercedes. Maybe that will help me be more in with God. It seems funny when I write that but, in some churches, give your ten percent and go to heaven! Ever give to a charity or a cause and discover that ten percent went to the cause? Ouch! Ever give money to a beggar? The ones I can?t resist, ?Could you give me a few bucks? I need a beer.? There was a lady with her children at McDonalds, counting pennies out for food. Ed bought them all food, ate with them then, played outside with the kids. They had a great time. When she left, Ed gave them all a hug and gave her a 100 bucks. My kind of charity ? yours, too? I Don?t Want It! Each of us has given something to somebody that they didn?t accept. For whatever reason, they didn?t accept it. Most of the time, it was something we really didn?t want to give. A sincere gift, whether money or a hug, your help or advice, is usually accepted graciously. Giving makes us better people. I?m not talking about material things. I?m not talking money. I?m talking about gifts. I talking about flowers somebody picked from their garden. I?m talking about a really good hug. I?m talking about somebody that can tell a great story, somebody who helps cook or somebody who even offers. You know the person. You know the people. I told them not to do the dishes but they?re doing them. They ask you if you need anything. They?re caring. They?re lavish with their love, they are great friends, good companions. Gosh, they bring so much to the party. Giver or Taker? Look in the mirror. Are you a giver or a taker. Give more of your love to others. Smile more. Hug more. Listen. Help. When you feel like you should do something, help with the dishes, get more wood for the fire. Find a way to help. Just do it. Give to the world. Give to yourself. Hot Kisses and Cars We all want to get invited back to the party. When somebody offers you a gift, take it. Say, ?Thank you.? That reminds me of my Dad. Dad told me, ?When anybody offers you money in this life, always, take it and sincerely say, ?Thank you.?? My Grandpa Goldberg used to give me money whenever I saw him. I remember he?d have a huge wad of sweaty money, a hundred on the outside. I got into it a few times and discovered fifty ones on the inside. He was a wonderful man. That?s my story and I?m sticking to it. His way to love was to give us some cash. He did give great hugs and he kissed me. I kiss all my friends. Maybe that?s where I learned it. He loved hot peppers; when he kissed me, my mouth burned! My Father would give me anything in his power: motorcycle, clothes, cars. He even bought me a car when I graduated from high school. It was his way of giving, showing me love, his way of loving. I appreciate it. But, it isn?t what I was looking for. I was looking for a hug. Don?t get me wrong. Dad definitely loves me and I love him. It was just so different from my world. Giving Open My Mom?s gifts were love and caring. She listened. She?d give anything she had of material goods. She gave of herself. She told me her fears. She told the truth. She was a free spirit. She wanted to heal the world. She still does. She?s a giver in the most precious way. Get Back On And Ride Be generous ? be giving. Look in the mirror. Clear your mind. What?s it feel like to get a gift, a special gift, as when somebody comes up and says you mean so much to them and thank you for that? Give unconditionally. When you receive, be thankful. I gave you my heart ? and you stomped on it. Ouch. Sometimes, life is hard. It?s hurtful. We?ve all given gifts that were precious to us, but unappreciated. Remember the good gifts. Keep giving. Forgive those you gave gifts to, gifts that you gave and were stomped on. Hey, if you get bucked off, get back on. And ride, baby ride. Stay strong. Stay mentally tough. Remember the good, the positive. Give unconditionally. Be thankful. Be loving. Be a giver. Be generous. It?s Not That Easy! It?s not that easy. Yes. It is that easy! It?s simple. We all know the difference between right and wrong. Yes it is just that easy. Smile. It?s the first thing people notice about you. Write down a few things you do to can help others. No Blue Ball Ever want something special from somebody? Want them to give it to you so bad? My Grandfather was a blustering, opinionated, ?I?m always right? kind of guy. He was impetuous. His sons did not feel accepted and loved by him. He was a man who showed very few emotions other than brashness: he was tough to be around. Don, one of his sons, was going through therapy. My uncle was a tender, thoughtful child. He wanted his dad to listen to him, to be kind and caring, to recognize him. He didn?t know if he really loved his dad or if his dad really loved him. While he was going through therapy, he had a dream. Uncle Don tells the story like this: His Dad Irv would reach into his pocket and say, ?quarter? and flip the quarter out to him. He could tell what coin it was without looking at it. He would pull a dime out and say ?dime? (yeah, the same Grandfather that always gave us cash when we saw him) and flip the dime to him. In the dream, Don asked his Dad for some blue love. Irv pulled a purple marble out of his pocket. ?I want some blue love, Dad.? And Irv pulled a red marble out of his pocket. ?No, Dad. I want blue love.? Irv then pulled a green marble out of his pocket. Then Irv fell over backwards. When he hit the ground, all of the marbles rolled out of his pocket. There were no blue marbles. He didn?t have the blue love Don wanted. His Dad did not have it in him. Get it? We knock ourselves out wanting things from people that they don?t have. Forget it. Be a giver. Some people are just not capable of giving you what you really want from them. At what point do we give up? Usually, if we want something that bad from someone, it?s our parent, our son, our daughter, our mate or our coach. The Ring Have you ever received a gift that?s beautiful and special but it?s not what you want? Not what you had in mind? Maybe the gift giver spent months picking it out, finding exactly what they thought was the right gift. When Richard was dating his wife Rhonda, they were discussing what type of rings they?d like. Richard told her exactly what he wanted: a gold band, plain, thin and simple. He described it perfectly, exactly the ring he wanted. Rhonda shopped for months. She went to many different jewelry stores and fell in love with a ring that, in reality, was a lot nicer (diamonds throughout) than the one Richard had described. She dressed up, took him to a special dinner, and bought him his favorite drink, which had a heart and two beautiful curly straws in it. He knew something was up. His heart was pounding. He was excited. Her heart was pounding. She was excited. She had tears in her eyes. They loved each other. They wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. They both held their breath as he pulled the ring from the drink. ?What the hell is this? This isn?t what I wanted. This is all wrong. You know this is not the ring I wanted.? What a Dick! She cried when she went home. She was trying to give him something so special ? a piece of her heart ? something she couldn?t even afford. She was crushed. Richard was crushed. She returned the ring and got the one he wanted. Both Hurt This is a perfect example of giving something special and having it rejected. It hurts deeply. Who do you think was hurt more? Initially, Rhonda, but Richard learned that he had been wrong. He knew he handled it terribly which is why he told me this story. And that?s why I?m telling you. Could he have handled it better? How about, ?Thank you honey. It?s so beautiful. It?s nicer than anything I could have imagined.? In a sense Richard would be lying by saying this. But only a shallow person would see this as a lie because it is such a special gift; it means so much to her. He ruined the moment. He broke her heart. Yeah, it healed. He got the ring he wanted. I bet when he looks at it, he thinks about the other ring. Mom thinks we should give people what they want ? not what we want to give. That?s a point. Although, Pop always wanted to give what he wanted to give. Love What You Get So, be prepared to love what you get even if you don?t get what you love. Did Rich change? He?s doing his best. He can do better. So can the rest of us. Is it just that simple? Yeah. It truly is just that simple. The choice is yours: Happy? Or miserable? What do you choose? Self Control Sometimes we need to stop, take a quick breath and not say anything that hurts the other person or destroys the moment.0